Saturday, August 18, 2012

30 Day Challenge - Day 2 - Part 3

Here is another Facebook Note I wrote that involves Womens' Rights.  

Originally written April 18, 2008 (before I had even met my now-husband) and originally titled: 

I Reserve the Right to Say NO!

"
Pretty woman is one of my favorite movies and Julia Roberts one of my favorite actresses. In Pretty Woman, Julia Roberts plays Vivian, a prostitute, a woman who sells sexual favors for rent money. There’s a scene in the movie where Vivian is frustrated and feels like she is losing controls and is screaming 

“I say who! I say when! I say WHO!” 

Funny how she had to be a prostitute to feel like she was in control of when she had sex or who she had sex with. 


I read in a magazine lately that after surveying several English language specialists, it was determined that the most underused word in the English language was “no” and he most overused was “yes.”


As a woman in America I have a ton of rights and privileges that women elsewhere do not enjoy:
I can say YES I want a driver’s license!
YES I want to vote on my President!
YES I want to be President!
YES I want to have a job and be a mommy too!
YES I want to choose when I have a baby, even if it means terminating my current pregnancy!
YES I want to have the same jobs as men and 
YES I want to get paid just as much as a man!!
But, as a woman in America, I have an often overlooked right that many women around the world have never had: the right to say NO!
As I demand the right to say Yes, I reserve my right to say NO!


NO, I will not have sex with you because you bought me three meals and took me to three movies and call it three dates and that's apparently all it takes to get an all access pass to my body.


NO, I will not have sex with you because you used the ‘magic words’: “I love you”


NO, I will not have sex with you because you call me pretty
Or beautiful
Or gorgeous
Or lovely
Or sexy
Or baby 
Or sweetie
These are not passwords to get in my pants!


NO, I will not have sex with you to affirm you as a man.


NO, I will not have sex with you because you promise to be around if there’s a consequence nine months later.


NO, I will not have sex with you because you are my boyfriend
Or my fiancée
Or a man I met in a bar after a bad day at work.


NO, I will not have sex with you to affirm my beauty as woman.


NO, I will not have sex with you and allow my value as a woman to be defined by my skills between the sheets.


NO, I will not have sex with you to prove my love for you.


NO, I will not have sex with you because everyone else is having sex.


NO, I will not have sex with you to relieve you because it’s driving you crazy.


NO, I will not have sex with you as a way to decide if we are compatible.


NO, I will not have sex with you to make you love me.


NO, I will not have sex with you to keep you around.


NO, I will not have sex with you because you are a gentleman and opened the door.


NO, I will not have sex with you as a reward for good behavior.


Let me just remind you, sirs, that you must have our permission to get what you want. And more importantly, let me remind you that you’re goal should not be to have the pleasure of getting between my legs but to have the honor to stand beside me and be called my man, my husband.


So, NO, I will not have sex with you.


I reserve my right to say No and I will exercise that right whenever necessary.


And I hope and pray I am not the only woman to do so.


“We say who, We say when.”      "







Post Script: I know I mentioned some things in the YES part that are controversial (namely, abortion).  The YES was to the fact that I currently have that right, not necessarily YES to my opinion of it.  If you'd like to discuss my opinions on that subject, without assuming that you already know them, feel free to contact me. 

Sorry, I just got asked that a lot when I first wrote it, so I thought I'd just answer it now. 

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